Wednesday, 20 December 2023

#50 A Riz Christmas Finale + Riz’s Silent Night

Happy Blog Day Everyone!

Well, here it is, the last Blog before Christmas, and with it two special offerings!

First off is the concluding part of A Riz Christmas and then something extra special, a brand new short story!

So read on...

The Comic Tales of Brennan and Riz


And there we go! Alls well that ends well. Proved really hard to get the words in there, so I'm glad it's over with!

The eagle-eyed amongst you might have realised that we're now 50 issues in and from 53, the strip will have been going for a year with no breaks! This hasn't been easy to achieve, I tell you. 

Riz’s Silent Night

Its been a while since I last posted any original fiction Exclusive to this blog (Brennan and Riz: Pandemic Blues for those wondering, right before my hiatus), so with it being Christmas, I thought it was a good time for a new one. So, please enjoy this story:

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     Our story begins one Christmas eve, in the office slash home of one Brennan and Riz. Though our tale doesn’t concern Brennan, whose Christmas spirit is driving the rat Riz to despair.

     Riz tried to block out the music, he did his best to ignore the decorations hanging from every available space, he even looked past the tree that occupied his third favourite napping place. What he couldn’t overlook, in this season so festive, was Brennan and Valarie, drunk on Karaoke. It may have been their seasonal tradition, but as far as Riz was concerned, there could only be one in the office who was the master of the mike.

     With the last straw well and truly broken, Riz set out into the cold night, eager to find a drink that didn’t come with an ear splitting rendition of Away in a Manager. Considering that fact, no one would blame him.


     The wind ruffled through his fur, and as Riz crawled through the dark streets, each bright light irritated him more. Another week, that’s all he had to wait, if he drank enough he wouldn’t even be awake. A horror awaited him with every pub he tried, a barred door and dark visage.

     “How can dey be shut!” he squeaked out with a sober cry. He cursed his luck and carried on his quest.


     He'd been out an hour now, wandering on all fours, and with each passing moment, he acted as he was dying of thirst. He even passed some of his kin, raiding a bin, and even they gave him a look of ‘what are you doing?’. They quickly scattered though, and Riz wondered why. A quick glance told him that they were all alone under the full moonlight. He looked up, and saw the fleeting shadow, of something that should not be but was, flittering through the night. There are few things in this world that can make Riz give up a drink, but danger is at the top of that list. He wanted booze yes, but also knew when to snooze, he thought about retreating when saw another and another. The shadows disappeared as quickly as they came, with Riz sighing much relief. He justified himself saying he doesn’t work for free:

     “If someone wanted me ta take on dose things dey wud ‘ave paid a fee!” He goes to carry on, but looks back in the direction that the shadows disappeared. He thinks to himself that all the time with Brennan has rubbed off on him, he can hear the faintest vestige of a conscience trying to make contact with him. A conscience of course, that he swore off a long time ago. Like a distant echo, it urged him to pursue what ever entity had flown by, as like Riz himself, anything out late on Christmas Eve could surely be up to no good. Knowing that any attempt to argue would result in it never shutting up. Feeling a heavy burden, he heads off after the shadows, doing a deed right.

     He absolutely hated this, it should be said. If faced with a choice he'd rather be dead. Still, he did his due diligence, and pressed on. A few moments more about with no danger in sight, he thought about returning home, till sinister growl put him right.

     “In there lies the food, all snug in a bed,” a voice above sang. Riz tilted his head back and saw three Gargoyles with stony skin circled a house, one in particular flew close to a window, peering inside.

     “Soddin, Gargoyles…Y did it ave ta be Gargoyles! Especially wit out Bren ta act as bait!” Riz cried. As much as the burden was weighing down on him, he still wanted to miles away, chewing on something fried.

     The creatures above paid him no heed, they were too busy getting ready to feed.

     It was now or never, for our furry friend, to take action. His thoughts split into fractions. He grabbed a stone in his little paws, and started gnawing. 

     This was the point, when the Gargoyles noticed the little rat, biting on stones in the morning. A peculiar sight, they started laughing at the vermin, dispensing insults with ease.

     “Look at that rat down there! Does it want us to stop? Does it want us to say please?”

     Riz wasn't bothered, on the contrary, he wanted them to do more. To shout at him till their throats were sore. Afterall, they wouldn’t be laughing in a minute, no, he expected them to be pleading for mercy.

     “Oh noes! Does Grotesques up dere do look fancy!” Riz was sure his acting would win an award.

     “Grotesques?” All three Gargoyles cried out. “We're going to leave you out for the count!”

     The Gargoyles left the window they were hungrily watching, and came down to the lonesome animal. They never understood the danger they were on from the plucky mammal. 

     The leader of the three scooped up Riz on its granite like grip.

     “Rite,” said Riz. “Dis is ya first nd last warnin before I let rip!”

     "We'd like to see that!” The Gargoyles laughed, though little did they know, they'd get just that.

     Riz waited till they were all close by, and with an evil smirk he uttered two terrible words. Had the Gargoyles understood they may have begged for their life. As it was Riz cut off their cries like he wielded a knife.

     Of the words he used, I can't repeat here, but let's just say, they did the trick, thanks to his little Rune Stone, the Gargoyles couldn't take the mick.

     A flash of light and it was all over. 

     Riz admired his handiwork, some of his finest yet. He just wished there was someone around to put in his debt. An act of charity, he'd never admit but it was still a silent night, so no witnesses to his good deed.


     What of the Gargoyles, I hear you ask? Well, the child they were after, awoke at sunrise. He found three stone statues outside his window it was a big surprise.


     Our hero, Riz, what did he do next? He returned home, sadly sober and alone. Yet, under the little plastic Christmas tree was a present for hin, unsurprisingly it was a bottle of rare gin. At last, his quest was over, the drinking could begin.


     So please remember, this Christmas season, of those little acts you can do. The spirit of the season, is of doing the best you can do.


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Well, that's it for this week!

If you're celebrating, I hope you have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy Hanukkah for the Jewish. If you don't celebrate either, be good to yourselves.

Till next time,

Keep on writing!

Peter James Martin

Quick Links

The Strange Tales of Brennan and Riz Volume 1

The Strange Tales of Brennan and Riz Book 1: A Boy and A Rat

The Strange Tales of Brennan and Riz Volume 2

Malarkey's Imaginomnibus Volume 1

Malarkey's Imaginomnibus Fade to Noir

Malarkey's Imaginomnibus Hubble Bubble

Harvey Duckman Presents Volume 13

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